I’m thirty now and I love being thirty. It’s a good time for me.
What do you admire most in others?
Kindness, because kindness is a choice. Niceness is an act. But kindness is deeper, it’s not inherent. It’s something that you have to want to be.
Immediate turn off?
Rampant cynicism. I think a lot of people confuse cynicism with intelligence. And while I truly believe in critical thinking, I don’t think that the cynical view is inherently the intelligent view. People who think that rub me the wrong way.
Something that makes you smile?
Dogs and babies. I don’t know many people on my block. but I know most of the dogs on my block. And I love babies. I used to be a nanny. I don’t know if I want my own, but I dig other peoples.
Biggest insecurity or fear?
That I’m not as smart as I think I am.
When do you feel like the best version of yourself?
When I wake up in the morning and I drink my water and make my tea, sit on the couch and meditate for 10 minutes, then head straight to my computer and open it and know right where I want to start writing. That’s when I feel the best about myself. That is when I feel like I am surging with energy and motivation. And that I am doing, in that moment, the thing I’m supposed to be doing.
Words you live by?
No person can be summed up by the best or worst thing they’ve ever done. I must have read it somewhere a long time ago. I think that finding that stuff out about my dad when I was younger blurred a certain line. Where I had to, eventually, be able to say, ‘I love my dad and my dad did very bad thing.’ And that those two things together can be true. As I’ve gotten older, that has served me well. To be able to recognize that a person who has done something really great, might not be the greatest person, and that a person who has done something really terrible might not be the worst person. That grey area is uncomfortable, but it is most of reality.
Something you have yet to figure out in life?
If it is possible to be a person who thinks about money a lot but does not let money rule their life. I’m still figuring that out because I’m trying to be more responsible and intentional with my money, as I have disposable income for the first time in my life. And I am also trying not to be a person who spends a significant portion of their time thinking about their money, and thinking money says something about who they are.
Something you have figured out?
I have figured out, for sure, that real love liberates you. There is a quote from Maya Angelou, where she says, ‘Love liberates, it does not bind.’ And that is, right now, the most true thing I know. Love doesn’t want to hold you back. Love doesn’t want to diminish you. Love wants to see you fly. Love wants to see you grow. I’ve never in my life seen anything that opposes that truth. And I don’t think I ever will. Because in a world where there are few hard facts about emotion, that’s a real one.